View current page
...more recent posts
Hot Dogs And Hair Balls 9.13.97
Erica made four on Monday and Mama D made 66 on Tuesday.
The boom box perched on the ledge of Mama D's front windows was playing old school rhythm and blues and soul most of the night of her party, but eventually at any party in front of Mama D's the kids will want to hear a little of their own music so they can "dance."
Magnolia Shorty (?) has a tune that goes something like this--"Monkey on your dick, monkey on your dick, monkey on your dick." The music is high energy hard edged hip hop, and is especially conducive to highlighting the athletic ability of twelve-year-old girls. E's daughter, J, is probably the most proficient of the twelve-year-old exotic dancers on Dumaine. Resembling a hybrid yoga/calisthenics workout at first, the dancing soon evolves into what can only be described as very athletic raw sex with an imaginary partner, much of this from the rear, but the young J is most decidedly not portraying the female as passive submissive participant. I venture a prolonged glance at this spectacle, while trying to maintain the visage of a detached scientist. It is amazing how J can keep her balance in that position, with her back arched so severely, her undulating ass so high in the air, only one arm and one leg touching the ground, the other arm and leg spread wide, balancing and inviting. Four younger girls, from four years to 18 months, try to imitate but aren't getting the encouragement they might on another night. And Magnolia Shorty is a one hit wonder this night as we are soon listening again to Etta James and Sam Cooke.
"Would you like some more of that Canadian Mist?" E asks me.
"Gah, I don't know E…"
"Mama D!" E shouts, "show Jim where is the hard liquor." And I follow Mama D inside and she points to a coffee table in the front room where sits several bottles of liquor, and a few liqueurs.
"Help yourself, Jim, " Mama D slurs.
"Thank you Mama D," I say, and pour myself a double.
Back outside I’m thinking I should have eaten more. Earlier Mama D had passed by me and laid a platter of 30 or 40 individually wrapped chili dogs on my lap. I took the opportunity to pin a five dollar bill to her blouse to go with all the other denominations of paper money pinned to her shoulder. It wasn't until after I pinned the five to her that she offered me ribs and chicken. There's a lot more people staying by Mama D today, that were in jail the last time we got together, so I regretfully decline her offer of real food and forced down a hot dog.
But now I've been at the party over an hour and am fully fortified by the Mist.
"E, did you make any stuffed eggs tonight?"
"Ohhh, I make a wonderful stuffed egg."
"That's very interesting E, but did you make any tonight?"
"No I did not, and are you getting sassy with me? Because if you are I’m gonna halfta divorce you."
"Well you ain't gonna see me boo-hooing over a woman who can't keep stuffed eggs in fronta her man."
"Ohhh that's it, ima divorcin' you."
"No you're not E."
"Yeah you right, darlin.' You want me to see if I can find you some eggs?"
"If Mama D can spare them, yes."
"Oh she can spare 'em, you just wait."
And E comes back with a saucer with five stuffed eggs on it and hands it to me, saying, "Mama D say give all the eggs to Jim."
As I'm stuffing the last egg into my mouth, Mama D walks by and I say, "thank you Mama D, the eggs are delicious."
Mama D smiles, "everybody say I make good eggs."
"I can't argue with that," I say.
E leans over and says, "I make better eggs."
"Show me darlin,' show me."
"Oh I will baby, I will."
Erica sits on my lap and shows me the Minnie Mouse figurine she got for her birthday. E yells at her to "get off Mr. Jim's lap." Jealous.
Jacque Lewis asks me how is the kitten doing.
"Well, uh, I don't know how to tell you this Jacque, but, well, I ate the kitten last night."
"Ohhh nooo, you did really, why'd you do that?"
"I was hungry," I tell him. And then I think of something else and I say, "Jacque, Jacque, come here, do this thing for me."
"No, no, no," Jacque squeals.
"Please Jacque."
He comes a little closer, "OK, what?"
"Ask me, 'how is the kitten, Mr. Jim.'"
He's not sure about all this but he finally says, "How is the kitten, Mr. Jim?"
I suck on my teeth while using my thumbnail as a toothpick, and say, "Delicious."
"Ohhh, that's terrible," but later he drags Shelton over and says, "Shelton, ask Mr. Jim how is his kitten?"
Shelton does and when I say, "delicious," he raises his eyebrows a bit, and turns around and walks off. Because his back was turned, I could not tell if he was laughing, or not.