Appropriately, when Franco finally got up and took over the podium, he announced, “The joke’s on all of you. This is not a roast. This is my greatest, most elaborate art installation ever. I’m not the real guest of honor, these aren’t real comedians, and we’re not even on a real network. What you’ve seen tonight was my brilliant opus to sequester an artistic visionary and subject him to the mindless incoherent trashings of talentless abnormalities. I call it Genius Unscathed, and this is my masterpiece.” Then he spray-painted "FRANCO, BITCHES" on the lectern.