grey goo AT
View current page...more recent posts
Science Corner #2: Nature Wins sm
It seems as if the nuture/nature debate has finally drawn to a close. Three of the worlds leading scientists, synaptics expert Orville Bags, philosopher Barbara Bennet, and linguist Steven Sweeter, have jointly released the findings of an interdisciplinary experiment proving once and for all that nature rules. "Contrary to popular belief," says Sweeter, "all of the world's people are culturally very similar. It's their genes that make some of them better than others." In the study, which was fast-tracked to produce timely results, a sample of the world's peoples were tested for performance abilities in several areas such as IQ, sports and co-operation. "The results were all over the map," explained Bags, "but since we drew all the subjects from the same housing complex we knew that environment wasn't a factor. Instead we hired a medical imaging techican to give us a graphical interpretation of each subject's genetic code, rendered in conté chalks. Then, under carefully controlled conditions, we photocopied each of the drawings many times, so that the images broke down. The genetic codes that showed the least degredation matched the individuals with the highest performances, 5.2 times out of 10. Admittedly our sample group was small, we could only include results from 8 participants because someone spilled coffee on the zerox machine, nevertheless we feel confident that our results prove conclusively that strong genes are the most direct link to human success."
Scientists and Social Engineering experts rejoiced at the news. Population Control Consultant Douglas Romsfeld expressed his pleasure at the World Conference on Ethical Expendability last month at the Rwanda Hotel. "We've been waiting a long time for news like this, it almost seems too good to be true. Respected world governments come to us everyday looking for justifications for this or that policy, action, or lack of action. Now we can offer concrete evidence that some people are inherently expendable so we can shut up these whiners, like this Cindy Sheehan or whatever her name is "Why did you kill my son, why did you kill my son." My god, I'll tell you why lady, cause your son was almost as useless to us a you are! You see? Before this paper came out, I wouldn't have been allowed to say that in public! This is a great day for the ruling class. I mean, the white ruling class."