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Email From Near Galvez
I am in the throes of a mild but certifiable panic attack based upon the most obvious fact that I did not buy anywhere near enough crawfish to suit my current needs. Please excuse the ageism/sexism but I bought like a little girl's portion or something. What was I thinking?
Now there's a live brass band jamming fierce on Galvez, even though its not much more than a whisper in this room four blocks away.
I've never had a TV during Mardi Gras before and not like its a desirable thing but they broadcast the parades on local TV and I switched on for a minute and got to see our new mayor, Ray Nagin, obviously very comfortable, if not drunk to the gills, dressed ever so nattily in a Buffalo Soldiers uniform and hat, perform the toast to King Rex (a different prominent local white male every year). But even better than his heartfelt, if slightly ill-timed and slurrily delivered toast was his comment over the PA system to US senator Mary Landrieu, who is riding in the King's court float preceding the king. She's dressed in that Carnival royalty costume that is associated with affluent white Carnival, the glittery gold smock? dress/mini-skirt over white tights, and she's kneeling down and looking as she is capable of looking, kinda if not overtly sexy, and Ray says lookit Mary Landrieu coming down the street lookins so fine. And then he tries to cover himself by adding--wearing that buffalo soldier suit but she ain't wearing it, he is. Anyway, he's very popular now, and they're both democrats, and he didn't do anything but make a drunken man's compliment on the last day set aside to overtly celebrate drunkeness. And I would like to add she did too look fine from my angle, and Red Stripe count.
It got quiet again. With car horns and motorcycle engines. And now the vocal protesations of a small throng, all muffled by my attention span.
After The Crawfish
There goes a proud guy walking up Iberville between Rocheblave and Dorgenios wearing the biggest damned beads Mardi Gras has to offer. Those beads are the size of tennis balls, but shiney like glass, in the traditional purple, green, and gold colors. They're kinda obscene those beads, but anybody'd be proud (and slightly embarrassed) to catch them. Looks like he's just dropping them in his car parked along Iberville between the Pentecostal church and school. That's the thing with those big beads, you can't really move around very comfortably while wearing them, or so I imagine.
It's gotten really quiet; sometimes the bands just march without playing. And sometimes the parades just break down and stop for long periods. Somebody just now pushed the envelope and parked technically in front of my driveway but still allowing me an ample diagonal escape route. That's why I got the day's provisions early. The only other place I would go today I can walk to, although it is unlikely I will choose to do so. I have barely dented the Red Stripe six pack, and half the crawfish are left.
Now some revelers, now some quiet, car door slamming. Brass band playing on passing tape, fades.
A panel van drives along Rocheblave with blaring verbal advertisement for its ownself--WWOZ, public radio, 90.7. Quiet until hip hop rides the doppler. Drums. Aretha. Under gray glaring skies. Watchdog barks a two beat, Killer grumbles, Sheba raises an eyebrow.
Is That Spike Lee?
People are starting to park on the street. The Zulu parade with this year's grand marshall, Spike Lee, is winding its way across town, and will officially end about four blocks from here at Galvez and Canal. Earlier I went out to my car to get an empty frappuccino bottle from the floorboard so I could check my spelling of frappuccino, and I could smell that unmistakable charcoal and lighter-fluid smell from barbecue grills all over the area.
I tried to get into Carnival this year. I walked down Canal to the French Quarter on Saturday, had a dozen oysters and a beer on Iberville, tried my damnedest to embrace the drunken humanity all around me, tried to be happy about the few bare breasts I saw, slipped into Harrah's Casino and like an unhappy rat in a maze tried to find my way out again, went into Canal Place and tried not to look at myself in the mirrored elevator, had some sweet and sour shrimp, went back out, stood in the middle of Canal Blvd., lit up what appeared to be a cigarette right in front of but downwind from the police van, caught two or three floats and a couple of marching bands of the all female Iris parade, elbowed a guy in the head in self-defense, took a few pictures, became discouraged, and went back to Canal Place to see the 3:30 showing of Polanski's Pianist. I was really thirsty and so instead of paying three dollars for a bottle of Cinema water, I went back to the Chinese place at the food court and got a 10 cent cup of water. Before I bought my ticket I asked the guy taking tickets if he was going to let me bring my water in. He said he really wasn't supposed to encourage that but...maybe if I hid it. He watched me buy a ticket and slide the cup down to my side and pretended to be befuddled when I misdirected his attention by saying, look, there goes Denzel Washington.
Now I can hear the marching bands for Zulu on Galvez. Today it's better if I just stay here and imagine that I'm missing all the fun. I'm not making the greatest use of this space, really. On Friday I had even done a little Travelocity searching for low last minute fares to someplace other than this, set up an account and asked for email reminders when fares to such and such got below such and such. Next year maybe I'll leave town and somebody else can stay here for Mardi Gras. Free New Orleans Mardi Gras lodging. Eat that Googlebot.
Hello Sheriff
Twenty years ago or so I was going through a phase, or so people hoped, where I found myself in trouble with the law more than ocassionally. Even before that, by a few years, say like when I was seventeen, a cop in suburbia N. Dallas, while looking at my driver's license, asked me my name and address, and I responded, "isn't it on my license?" The cop did not beat me up but he gave me a pretty good verbal reaming. So, no matter how daft a cop may appear, just answer the question. Over the next ten years though I made many mistakes, and learned something about police, even coming to respect them in some measure, you know, for the small things--the loose cuffing, the placing of a lit cigarette between my lips, or the bit of conversation about nothing in particular. Inside of jails I saw cops beat up citizens who acted out. To my way of thinking, by the time you end up in jail, the game is over, you are a loser, shut up, learn from mistakes, try to do better next time. Do not EVER disrespect a cop inside of his own jail. Gee, this is sounding like a manual. What am I--anticipating the breakdown of society? Do I think there is some scenario looming where rank and file citizens are going to need this advice? No, that's not it. I'm just thinking out loud.
I was at a grocery store this morning at 8 buying beer and vodka, a few crawfish, some hamburger, some cheese, some orange juice, and some ruby red grapefruit juice. The sheriff's deputy who provides security for the store and sees me almost every morning at 6:15 buying bottled vanilla frappuccino, a banana, and the almond joy candy bar, recognized me out of my work clothes and said, "not working today?" I expressed some grumpiness towards Mardi Gras, he concurred, said, "yeah, I hope it rains." Before this guy came to provide security, me and the early morning cashier used to watch guys come in off the street, b-line for the liquor shelves, grab a half gallon of Jack Daniels, and maybe ten or twelve of those faux baseball jerseys, and just walk right on out cool as can be, or cool as one can be winding down from up all night on crack cocaine.
That's mostly it then. I was happy to see the sheriff this morning.